So one of my Facebook friends posted an article about how “marriage isn’t about your happiness”. The title of the article stopped me in my tracks and I stared at it and thought for a sec then I decided to open the article and skim through it. I was trying to develop an opinion and decide what I thought about his. Yes I’ve been divorced. My marriage didn’t work out. This article was telling me I was supposed to stay in my marriage anyway and that I’m self-centered for leaving it. I was supposed to stay married to someone that wasn’t willing to make changes that I asked for because well, apparently marriage isn’t about my happiness. I’m supposed to stay married to someone that wasn’t willing to really try or put in effort, because my happiness doesn’t matter in marriage I guess. I was supposed to stay married to someone that was mean, spent more time with video games than me and complained about everything we did because being happy apparently doesn’t matter when you’re married.
I totally disagree with the article. Your happiness does matter in a marriage. Yes I understand making sacrifice and compromise and yeah you won’t always be happy with that but you do it because you love the other person and it makes you happy when they are happy. I understand there are bad days and hard times, been there done that. But when you try and try in a marriage and get nothing in return I see nothing wrong with eventually leaving the relationship. Why should you live the rest of your life giving and trying and getting little to no effort from the other person? Why should you settle for that? Why should you sit there putting in most of the work if not all while the other person isn’t willing to seriously make the changes needed? I guess I don’t understand why you’d live your life unhappy all because you are legally bound to someone. So why is it acceptable if you’re unhappy in a long term relationship and decide to leave and not socially acceptable in a marriage? I’m pretty sure the answer boils down to religion. Which I’m not touching in this post.
I guess bottom line is if you try and try in a marriage and it just isn’t working and both parties aren’t willing to make the changes needed and you’re unhappy then fucking leave! Get out! End it! Why waste your time and theirs any longer? Maybe I’m missing a piece of the puzzle here, I don’t know but this is how I feel about the matter. Everyone is different and so is every situation I get that. But to tell someone that their marriage isn’t about their happiness is a bunch of crap to me. You deserve to be fucking happy!
Ok rant over. Peace and Love my friends. 🙂